Podcast Guest Spot on The Lachlan McLeod Show

Hoard World, Lachlan McLeod and Ghostbeard13

HELLO.

After years of refusing to be on other people's podcasts because I'm a goddamn diva, I finally buckled when my good pal Lachlan McLeod put the hard word on me last Saturday. And boy did we podcast.

In the recorded 150 minutes that transpired we covered  FREE COMIC BOOK DAY 2018 at All Star Comics Melbourne, what people were wearing on the day and a selection of FCBD titles as well as 108 minutes of topics like MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE TOYS , GROWING UP IN THE 80S AND 90S, SUPER POWERS TOYS,  BATMAN, JACK COLE'S UNTIMELY DEMISE, THE LONGING FOR MARVEL MERCH AND DECENT MARVEL MOVIES AS A KID and much, much more.

If you've ever wanted to listen to two unashamed Aussie nerds talk shit for as long as the running time of Avengers: Infinity War, now's your chance!

Listen to Hoard World's very first podcast as a guest on The Lachlan McLeod Show HERE.

EDIT 29/5/19: SADLY, THESE PODCASTS ARE NO LONGER AVAILABLE ONLINE. THIS BLOG POST REMAINS FOR ARCHIVAL PURPOSES ONLY.

Hoard World Year Three in Review.

Monday July 6th 2015 is the third anniversary of the shenanigans that have become known as "Hoard World", so, as per usual, I take this magical moment in time to cast my weary eye-stalks back over the last 12 months. Let's see if we can't learn a thing or two, eh?

Incidentally, as you can no doubt tell by the assorted 3rd Birthday pics that accompany this retrospective blog entry, we had a great time. With Giant Cake. And over-sized celebratory candles. Thanks for asking.

MOTU DAY 2015: FIVE THINGS YOU CAN LEARN ABOUT THE MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE FROM THEIR VINTAGE GOLDEN BOOKS ADVENTURES

FOR THOSE WHO CAME IN LATE.......

MOTU Day is April 28th or so it was decreed back in 1987 by Los Angeles Mayor Tom Bradley.

He might not have meant for anybody to celebrate it in 1988 or ever again, but it's still an absolute fact. 

This actually happened. 

It doesn't matter that it was created for the sole purpose of promoting the POWER TOUR that was running through LA at the time - if it was good enough for Mayor Tom Bradley and the fine people of Los Angeles, it's good enough for you. 

MOTU has an actual day. (See: Los Angeles Times Article April 23rd, 1987 to read it transcribed in print)

So it was declared, so it shall be done. Forever and ever.  He-men.

MOTU DAY 2015 logo by The Toy Box

Masters of the Universe Classics Hordak Review (Mattel)

This review was originally published way back in April 2013 on Doomkick.com. It was written specifically for the Doomkick site's 1st Anniversary celebrations so may contain specific references to the site etc. Due to the age of the article, some of the information contained within may have dated somewhat. Although this piece was actually published before my "Mosquitor" guest review on Poe Ghostal's site, it is still chronologically (in terms of the order I wrote them) the second guest review I ever did. You can check out the originally published version (that comes with an introduction from Hoard World's "management") on the Doomkick site here.

Hi. I'm Hoardax.

Yes, the Hoardax. Maybe you've heard of me or maybe you've heard of me!

This isn't about me today, though. That was just a formality to set my new audience at ease. I am completely out of my comfort zone. Normally, I'd be talking to the legion of Hoard Worlders over on my Facey B page or on The Blog - to rapturous applause, often a standing ovation.

But today, I talk to YOU - The Doomkickers. Be gentle with me, won't you? Like many artists, or siblings of Evil Dictators who have become estranged due to a conflict of interests (He wanted to murder everybody all the time; I enjoy collecting nice things and sharing my love of said things with the world via the internets), I am very sensitive.

Hoardsmas 2014: S.K.I.P: Strategic Kangaroo Impact Patrol (Huggingtons Twisted Toys) / Thrashor (8-Bit Zombie)

Hoardsmas looks a lot more like a present swapping pictorial in 2014.

I can't believe it's that time of year again. Yet, it is. It's HOARDSMAS. We've covered the day itself at least two times before in 2012 and 2013 as well as Hoardsmas themed articles you may care to read (or re-read) about He-man, Power Lords, Super Powers, Dear Santy Letters and Holiday Listicles.

Despite all this, you'd be surprised at how many letters we get every day asking us about HOARDSMAS. 

Predominantly stuff like "What is it?" and "Isn't it just Christmas?" or "How do I celebrate it? I need to know for my lifestyle."

So let me clarify it all for you, right now, once and for all, and for those playing along at home.

HOARDSMAS is about buying material possessions you absolutely don't need and giving them to people you mostly like (and occasionally people you only tolerate), under the guise of a magical creature is the one actually giving it to them. You may NOT take credit for these presents. The magical Hoardo Beast dropped them at your recipient's house for funsies! Don't mess this part up or you'll ruin hopes and dreams.

HOARDSMAS occurs whenever Hoardax can be bothered taking photos of the event. Sometimes this coincidentally lands on your planet's "Christmas Day." Often, not.

HOARDSMAS is about including everybody (regardless of denomination) in something most people can bond over: Alcoholism and Consumerism. If done correctly it can be a fun time for all.

I may or may not be drinking Egg Nog as I write this.

Please commit Hoardsmas responsibly.

But don't forget the most important aspect of HOARDSMAS!

After the magical Hoardo Beast gives you your material possessions, you have to briefly look at your new gifts with unbridled awe and a sense of satisfaction, before putting them in a box and not looking at them again for years.

Rinse. Repeat.

Do this for long enough and you too can have an area in your very own headquarters that gives you anxiety when you walk in there.

Now, that's the true spirit of Hoardsmas! 

HAPPY HONDA DAYS VS YOUR CHILDHOOD featuring Skeletor, He-man, Jem, Gumby, Pokey, G.I. Joe, Strawberry Shortcake, Stretch Armstrong & Fischer-Price Little People.

What If........Robot Chicken did a car commercial?

Honda's latest batch of U.S. based holiday season car commercials have dug deep into the Nostalgia factor this time around, featuring a variety of predominantly 80s toys hawking Honda's automotive wares to appeal to......well, everybody that was a kid in those eras, I guess.

While the idea is undeniably clever, what does it say about today's "adults" that Honda feels the need to tap into that demographic by reminding people of the joy they might've felt as a kid with a new toy, and likening it to buying their latest model?

It makes me feel funny in my tummy.

What it doesn't do is make me want to buy their car because they've found a way to "speak" to me.

It makes me want to burn everything I own because I'm a chump that is still dealing with the after-effects of exposure to 80s toy advertising as a young timer. And worse than that, continuing to celebrate it as an adult.

This ad says, "Hey Chump! Remember when we made you like this? We're going to use the same crap we made you like as a kid and use it to make you like our new car! You chump. Buy it chump. Welcome to capitalism."

Oh, hey Gumby...what's that? You can't find your soul?

SPOTLIGHT ON: INTERGALACTIC SKELETOR aka SPACE SKELETOR! aka NEW ADVENTURES SKELETOR by MATTEL

Intergalactic Skelly just flew into Hoard World and boy are his intergalactic arms tired!

You know, in all the years I've been doing Hoard World, I don't think we've ever done an actual spotlight on a Masters of the Universe Classics figure. Sure, there's been lots of pictures of them but never a focus on a single figure release. Well, maybe it's time to do more of that.

"Welcome to the Galaxy, bonehead."

The idea of Space He-man or Space Skeletor is a strange one (even though it makes perfect sense to yours truly) and something that never quite gelled with the children of 1989 or even the adults of the 2010s.

AN OPEN LETTER TO JEFF WADLOW - DIRECTOR OF THE UPCOMING MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE FILM.

Jeff Wadlow (Writer/Director of Kick-Ass 2, the upcoming X-Force film and allegedly the new He-man film).
Pic Source: Celluloid & Cigarette Burns.

I don't expect that Mr. Wadlow will ever see this (however, I plan on immediately tweeting this to him after I publish it....so, who knows?) but I do think that if there was ever a director on Earth who was directing a Masters of the Universe film who might actually read this, it's the one who turned up to SDCC 2014 and chatted to MOTU fans about the Masters of the Universe movie.

Previously here on Hoard World, I have dream cast the new Masters of the Universe film if you haven't read that yet (Jeff, you can take a look too, if you like pal) but this will indeed be the first time I have directly addressed a current director of the new Masters of the Universe film using the magic of the internets.

Ahem.

Here goes...

10 THINGS I WILL PROBABLY NEVER OWN (AND I'M FINE WITH THAT)

Picture by DoomKick (strangely enough not actually taken by me)

The idea for this latest feature was taken from the wildly popular Facey B folder of the same name that's an ongoing update of all the nice things that I wouldn't MIND owning, but for a variety of reasons including availability, finances and where they are on my list of consumer priority, will probably never own. That was a long sentence. My condolences.

And I'm fine with that. I've already made my peace. I tell myself.

So let's take a sneaky look at 10 of these aforementioned things that I will probably never own.

There's nothing the people of Earth like more than self-indulgent flights of fancy all wrapped up into a juicy Listicle!

SPOTLIGHT ON: E.A. HORDACUS & DARK RIDER by KABOOM TOYS

Geldor, E.A. Hordacus and your pal, Hoardax.

It's a great pleasure to be back again to spotlight more fantastic Toy Artists from around the globe.

This is the final installment of what has been a quartet of specifically focused Hoard World Spotlight Features.

The previous spotlights (in case you missed them) were:

• Luke Toywalker & Pablo Perra's Wrestlers Of The Universe. 
• Ryan Hall's 3-D Paper Toy Art pieces. 
• Eric Nilla & Wolf Voigt's M.U.S.C.L.E.S. of the Universe.

VALENTINE'S DAY featuring EXCLUSIVE tips from TV's Bryan Cranston of Breaking Bad fame.

Welcome to Valentine's Day on Hoard World - the only blog that is 99.1% pure...ROMANCE.

Last year, that jerk Hoardax gave you the Top 5 Valentine's Day Tips of All Time.

Well, I'm here to tell you - his romance was inferior.

This is the new shizz.

Let's cook.

SPOTLIGHT ON: M.U.S.C.L.E.'s of the UNIVERSE by ERIC NILLA & WOLF VOIGT.

It's with great pleasure and extreme excitement that I am back, yet again, to spotlight more fantastic Toy Artists who have found their way into my plastic, slime-filled heart. This is the third part of what is to be a quartet of super special Spotlight Features here on Hoard World.

If you missed out and want to read the first spotlight in this series that started way back in September, and focused on the awesome Goodleg Toys, you can do so right HERE. If you want to see December's focus on Ryan Hall's 3-D Paper Toy Art pieces, it's waiting right HERE for you.

What do you get when you cross Masters Of The Universe with M.U.S.C.L.E. Men?

HOARDAX DREAM CASTS THE NEW MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE LIVE ACTION MOVIE

Hoardax is such an egomaniac, he second-screens his own site when watching ANYTHING.

In 1987, one of Cannon Film's finest filmic moments was Masters Of The Universe starring Dolph Lundgren and Frank Langella. I saw it at the cinema as a child-like Hoardax. It blew my eight year old mind right in half. Cleaved in two like the power swords of the original MOTU storyline.

However, I realised pretty early into the flick that it was different from the Filmation cartoon and I was fine with that. I remember realising years earlier that the Filmation cartoon was also very different from the mini-comics and toyline I had already grown used to.

It was all a great lesson while I was young and impressionable that if you're a big enough fan of something you will adapt to various interpretations and find something to like in all of them. Sure, you don't have to, but it's entirely possible.

The original Masters Of The Universe motion picture is not why we're here today.

We're here to talk about the inevitable new film.

The highly anticipated and possibly-never-actually-happening modern interpretation of the 30ish year old Mattel kids toy line. Hasbro have had massive amounts of success with their licenses regardless of quality. Sci-fi / Fantasy / Superhero movies are the toast of the town right now. 80s nostalgia is peaking. Verily, we are living in a golden age that can only truly peak with a Masters Of The Universe live action film.

Personally, I think it could work better as an ongoing, dark, tongue-in-cheek Fantasy/Sci-Fi show with a macabre sense of humour that doesn't shy away from the existence of characters like SNOUT SPOUT. Maybe even on a US cable network. But that'll probably never happen.

So instead, let's CAST the future blockbuster attempt to create a new film franchise based on literally one of the weirdest and oft-maligned concepts in toy (and probably sci-fi/fantasy history).

This is my casting for the Masters Of The Universe film. The first film. If the powers that be ever read this and heed my words, there will be sequels. Verily.

QUICK UPDATE: BATMAN VILLAINS - CASTLE GRAYSKULL - EBAY IS EXCELLENT

It was about time that they met themselves.

It never rains, it pours eh?

No Hoard World Blog entries for almost two months and then three within a week!!!???!? Hachi-machi!!

There was just some stuff that I had to tell you all about.

For starters, after all these years, the Batman Villains got to finally meet the actors who played them on Television! It was quite a wonderful day. The Joker still can't believe he has a painted-over mustache on television, though.

Meanwhile, as has been well-documented on The Hoardstagram in both videos and pictures, Castle Grayskull has become quite the Tourist Trap since it landed on Hoard World.

When Hoardax himself hasn't been demanding drinks from "Robot Waiters", he's been running quite a racket. From Grayskull After Dark Dance Parties and charging local tourists to have their photo taken, to using the castle's ample space as an illegal parking garage.

Hoardax has the POWER!!!.....to make five bucks per holiday snap.

The Sorceress was less than impressed with a Wind Raider parked in her loungeroom.

Meanwhile, somebody said THIS on a recent Hoardsmas eBay sale over at the Hoard Store:

"Faultless seller - efficient, great communication and prices. Will use again."

That's probably the best eBay feedback I ever read. Not that I'm playing favourites. I love all positive feedback comments.

So eBay is being pretty excellent to me right now. That's alls I'm sayin'. Compadre. Calm your farm. Ok?

This is literally the best thing that ever happened.

This is not hyperbole. I don't even own a bowl!

And that's it!!

yr pal,

HOARDAX.

Oooh! Behind The Scenes! Oooh! You've seen some of the magic!

HOARDSMAS SEASONS GREETINGS 2013 aka THE HOARD IS FAMILY!

There hasn't been a family reunion like this since Darkseid moved to Apokolips, Hordak got stuck in Despondos and I moved to HOARD WORLD. First HOARDSMAS we've spent together in a long time albeit Hordak has turned up as GhostDak and projected himself here. You know, kinda like Skype. On a side note, Grizzlor loved the Predator Doll that Leech gave him for HOARDSMAS. And Zodac has fallen in love with his chocolate bar. 'nuff said.

Disclaimer: HOARD WORLD does not promote, condone or encourage any of the alcohol varieties that appear in the following photos. Please drink responsibly.

You should know that HOARDSMAS isn't Christmas.

SPOTLIGHT ON: GARBAGE PAIL KIDS

The iconic Garbage Pail Kids (GPK) trading cards from the 80s have been invading our consciousness now for almost 30 years. They owe their existence to cartoonists Art Spiegelman & Mark Newgarden and the Topps series that came before (like Wacky Packages). Naturally the original GPK artist John Pound also played a huge part in their origin since he drew the entire first series. And of course, The Cabbage Patch Kids were instrumental to the GPK's creation since they were the very thing being parodied.

They were so successful they were released all over the world (usually under a different title i.e. in New Zealand and Australia they were known as "The Garbage Gang.") and even spawned a live action movie and an animated series.

TOP 5 VALENTINE'S DAY TIPS OF ALL TIME!

Hoardax's Online Dating Profile 

NAME: Harold H. Hoardax

OCCUPATION: Overlord/Part-time eBay seller

AGE: You don't wanna know.

SEX: See Above.

LOCATION: Hoard World.

LOOKING FOR: Love in all the wrong places. 

LIKES

Hoarding

Plastic Things

Hoarding Plastic Things

DISLIKES

My brother Hordak

Going outside

Dust.

Valentine's Day. 

Love it or hate it - you can't escape it. 

Sadly, even Hoard World isn't safe.

And as it turns out there's a whole 'nother side to Hoard World that you ain't seen before.

I may not be able to write a dating profile to save my plastic behind but I know what love is.

I present to you now:

HOARDAX'S BEST EVER VALENTINE'S DAY ADVICE.

MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE CLASSICS NOW AVAILABLE TO BUY ON HOARD WORLD!

We thought the day would never come but finally it has!

As of THIS VERY MINUTE - there's a selection of Masters Of The Universe Classics on sale at The Hoard Store!

HAPPY NEW YEAR HOARD WORLDERS!

Happy New Year for whenever it's happening to you!

As you can see, It's happening on Hoard World right now!

Thanks for Hoard Worlding with me in 2012.

All the best to everybody in 2013!

yr pal,

Hoardax.

SEASONS GREETINGS FROM HOARD WORLD!

Everybody loves LOG from Blammo! for Hoardsmas.
It's Big! It's Heavy! It's Wood! It's LOG! LOG! It's better than bad, it's good!
(The only LOG commercial I could find on YouTube was German. Just replace the word "Klotz" with "LOG" and it's pretty much the same. Unless you're German, in which case...as you were.)