Tuesday 14 May 2013


A still photo from the set of Kramer V. Kramer remake: Hordak Vs Hordak. Alternate European Title: My Two Dads.

Recently your pal Hoardax has been cheating on his own blog with other sites. A guest review here. Some strange content there. In case you've missed them, I thought it might be a good idea to hoard this recent batch of goodness in the one convenient spot. Kinda like a Clip Show. Ya dig?

It has been an absolute honour and a privilege to have had the opportunity to do this sort of stuff and I am very grateful to the powers that be.

These powers in order of appearance were our good friends and allies over at the magnificent DoomKick, the genius that is the one man army creative force of Dinosaur Dracula (previously the long-running X-Entertainment) and the world renowned toy blog of the mighty Poe Ghostal.

First up was a guest review of the MOTUC Hordak figure over at DoomKick. This was less of a traditional action figure review and more of a commentary on my relationship with my brother Hordak, that quickly descended into name-calling and personal criticisms. It was so volatile that my management insisted that they add a disclaimer.

Now this is a body swap comedy I'd like to see! You can read the Hordak Review on DoomKick right HERE.

Having said all that, this was (and always will be) my very first EVER guest review! And you often cherish the first born the most despite their inherent flaws. Well, at least that's what I've found personally. I am five years older than my "twin" brother Hordak. You don't even want me to explain the complicated alien biology behind that.

Next up, it was time for Hoardax to become a home owner. Well, rent an apartment in a luxury building. Allow me to explain. Over at the Dinosaur Dracula site, something unique and interesting was happening.

Dino Drac's Luxury Apartments had been built. They were safe, spacious and affordable. What happened next was inspired. Dinosaur Dracula challenged readers to construct living quarters (residents and all) for a building that magically grew additional floors as more people (or creatures) moved in.

And that's exactly what happened - a virtual apartment building became home to more than sixty bizarre tenants, each with their own story to tell; all of them designed and created by a whole bunch of different people.

The Landlord - keeping a secret eye on his residents. (Picture courtesy of Dinosaur Dracula)

I immediately jumped at the chance to move two of my best guys from one of my favourite photo shoots (now with an all new back story) right into Apartment 10-C.

You can see that Odd Couple living in Bromanced Bliss right HERE.

Don't tell them I told you where they live.

While you've stopped by their place however, it might be a good idea to pay a visit to some of the other occupants. Like one of our neighbours GRUNT, for example.

Grunt The Lizard lives over in Apartment 13B and was created by John Strubelt the New Wave Junkie.
 This photo belongs to him. 

What was rewarding for me was seeing all the great work that had been put into this concept building by so many different people. There were no restrictions on ideas or entrants - it was all inclusive and it felt like one big family. I had an absolute ball meeting the neighbours. If you take a look at many of the comments feeds (especially the ones closest to my apartment) I opened up a dialogue with many of them. I told Sound Wave and his cronies (who live right below us) to turn their music down for instance. It was a lot of fun.

Finally, as a direct result of taking part in the Masters Of The Universe Day cross-over extravaganza, I was in contact with toy blogger Poe Ghostal. I have been aware of his existence for a long time now, and been reading his stuff for years, so this was a big thrill for me personally. He currently had a backlog of MOTUC figures that he doesn't own and needed guest reviews for. I kindly offered my services. He accepted. Now, given that I don't traditionally "review" action figures so much as do strange things with them (often in public view), this was going to be a challenge.

Hoardax cares not for things like articulation, sculpt or paint ops! I mean, I do - everybody does, naturally. These are important factors that influence whether or not you would even buy a figure! But what I mean is, I don't want to critically analyse them in a public forum. Not usually. Even when I spotlight something like I have in the past with Mezco's Earthworm Jim, Playmate's TMNT Classic figures or Rampageo Industries' Slimes mini-figures, I don't get particularly critical. Sure, I'd already "reviewed" Hordak for the Doomkick site but that wasn't exactly a Michael Crawford style take on the figure, to say the least.

As luck would have it, I was offered a guest spot to review the MOTUC Mosquitor figure. Which is a perfect fit for me. He's not only a member of The Horde but he's Pixel Dan's favourite figure. That would be like reviewing John Carpenter's favourite Howard Hawks film knowing that he might actually read it! Sort of. I might just be obsessed with John Carpenter. It's probably more like being a fan of film critic Leonard Maltin and then  reviewing his favourite film knowing that there's a chance he might read it.

Deleted Scene Photo of Mosquitor not used in the Poe Ghostal Review. 

So, I was stoked at the idea of it. But with that joy came pressure. What if I did a bad job? What if I actually suck at reviewing figures? What if my photos aren't up to scratch? It was going to be on a known toy site that I'm assuming gets way more traffic than Hoard World and PIXEL DAN MIGHT READ IT!!!

This wasn't a "The stock market has crashed and I've lost everything and now I need to jump off a building" type pressure, no. But I definitely felt like I needed to prove myself and that I had to do a decent job. I think it took me longer to write that review than anything else I've ever done on Hoard World. And by long, I mean about five or six hours plus the photos. Oh, and the two week lead-up to it to actually have the courage to sit down and do it. I think that took the longest amount of time. So, it took me two weeks and six hours to write. That's an eternity. I'm not Tolstoy. This isn't War and Peace. It's a review of MOSQUITOR.

Anyway, if you haven't read it already (and you're still reading this entry) HERE IT IS.

The slightly insane, overactively imagined internal struggle I had with this guest review reaped far better rewards on a personal level than most things. I felt like I'd achieved something. And I think, now that it's out there, that I'm proud of it.

I hope you like it. Pixel Dan retweeted it. So that's pretty cool.
(Ok, look I tweeted HIM about it first but STILL....)

Anyway, these are my most recent (and to date ONLY) guest spots that are floating around places that aren't Hoard World right now. I'd like to do more in the future.

But it's got me to thinking: Maybe I should have some guest spots, from other people that aren't me, right here on Hoard World? What do you think? And who would like to take a crack at it?

You know where to find me.

yr pal,


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